Volunteers
We need volunteers to help with our children’s work
It is really vital so we know that you won’t shirk!
The regulations tell us we must have sufficient staff.
Three children, for each adult. No! No! you mustn’t laugh!
Oh! And I should tell you, that you will have to be
Almost pure and spotless, a little bit like me!
We will have to vet you to see if you’ve been good,
Attended church each Sunday, and never ever rude!
There’s endless forms to fill in, to check up as we ought
The criminal records bureau will tell if you’ve been caught!
We’ll need to see your passport, your driving licence too.
And your latest gas bill, to prove that you are you!
I know this does not give us proof that you’re no abuser
But it shows we’ve done our best for any wild accuser!
I know you’ve gone through all of this a week or so ago
For your local cricket club and have the form to show,
But you must do it all again for every place you help
Even though repeating this is enough to make you yelp.
You may just stand outside the door and chat to parents
there
But the regulations do not appear to care!
I know you just put toys out for the Mums and Tods
And do not see the kids alone, that will make no odds!
Have the parents all been checked? Now you’re being silly!
We can’t insist on parent checks – not just willy-nilly!
It may be a wonder that people volunteer
With all the hoops and hurdles that they have to clear.
But all of us are conscious of the privilege we share
Showing those we work with just how much we care.
The smiles on children’s faces are all the thanks we need
Though stupid regulations are what have been decreed!
No comments:
Post a Comment